Well, It's time for another guest blogger today. How do I know? If nothing else has totally left me in awe over the last three years it is the fact that God, not Shannon, puts people into our paths in incredible ways and at just the right time. This talented and remarkable young lady's bio blew me away. And God has us introduced at just the right moment.
I know you will enjoy this. Her testimony blessed me very much and, as only God can, came at the very moment I needed it most.
Can’t think of a better way to welcome in a release of a new album
than to end Behind The Songs with Loved You Well! Releasing here on the
West Coast on CD Baby in less than 15 minutes! Already released on
iTunes!!! Woo hoo!
Track 10. Loved You Well
This was both a painful song to write and a liberating, healing song to write. Let me expound…
After 13 years of marriage (married August 1, 1987) and 3 children:
12, 9 & 3, we were divorced. A few months later saw us far away in
the high desert of Colorado Springs, CO trying to see if we could put
the pieces back together again. We had everything to gain and nothing to
lose, since we had already lost everything. Let me say, that God’s
grace is sufficient. He is a VERY BIG God and
can do anything, including reconciling broken marriages, first by
reconciling the two to Himself, and then to each other. Which is what
God did for my husband and me.
It was the hardest thing we have ever done to allow Him to work in
our hearts and to learn how to die to ourselves, removing any sense of
entitlement of “it’s not fair”. Likewise, the cross wasn’t fair. But He
(Christ Jesus), willingly laid down His life for us and then gloriously
raised it back up again. It really is the hardest thing to lay down your
life for another human being when you have been treated in a way that
is poor. But in our instance it was mutual. We both were horrible at
loving each other unconditionally. We had so much to learn about what
Christ did at the cross for us. What true love meant. I learned in our
counseling (it was quite the epiphany, although seems like a
“no-brainer”), that the same God that died for me, also died for my
husband and all his sins and failures.
A cloud of witnesses rejoiced along with our children and parents. We
were re-married on August 16, 2000, making every wrong right, and our
lives became sold out to Christ as a result. Our children made strong
commitments to Christ and to purity, including our daughters who made
vows to remain pure until marriage; they saved their first kiss for the
altar with their husbands and greatly honored their father and me (their
brother is following in their footsteps).
Reconciled and re-married, August 16, 2000.
I realize that not every relationship can turn around and find a
place of reconciliation like ours did. That is the reality of a fallen
world. But God takes us where we are at, even when we fail and the other
person gives up or we give up. Sometimes the damage is too great. It
takes both partners to be willing to work through their pain and come
back together again. This is what we chose, and our lives were never the
same again, nor our children’s lives and we have no regrets when we
have seen the outcomes.
On August 16, 2000 we re-married each other and it’s been another 13
and 1/2 years. It will be 27 years this August (we still count all the
years), but the kids like to celebrate the first anniversary because
then it means that they count. Craig and I like to celebrate the second
one because it was the one we worked the hardest for. To simplify
things, we celebrate from August 1 – August 16! :)
Here we are now, still plugging along. I’d like to say it get’s
easier, sometimes it does, but other times, it gets just as challenging
as we face milestones such as job changes, retirement, marrying off
adult children and becoming empty nesters. Even stepping out in faith
with this music ministry has been a great challenge to us. I know that
the Enemy of God does not want to see us be successful for the Kingdom.
So we dig our heels in a little deeper, cling on to our faith a bit
tighter and try to trust Him through all the unknowns. He doesn’t
guarantee that there will be no pain (in fact, He assures it) but He
guarantees that He will never leave us and that He will carry us through
the hard times…if we let Him.
What might it look like if we learned to love each other well? Not
just our spouses, but even our family members, friends and then our
enemies (those who are set against us). Will people that watch us, know
that we are Christians because we choose to love each other well to the
finish, or do we end up like those who have no hope? Where is our hope?
Is our God big enough for us?
Finish well by loving well, if you are able....
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KfS9BHfVGlU
A seasoned singer/songwriter, keyboardist and speaker, Jen weaves her
love of music and her professional career as a Christian mental health
counselor, along with her personal testimony of God’s faithfulness in
her own life. Her music ministry is an expression of hope and healing to
those who are hurting in a world of uncertain times.
Jen is available for speaking and singing engagements. She is currently looking for dates in the GA/TN areas in the next month. Do yourself a favor...go follow her at http://jenhaugland.com/. You will be blessed.
"So Hagar named the LORD who spoke to her, "You are the God who sees me," for she said, "Here I have seen one who sees me!" Genesis 16:13
EL ROI...this is the name given to Yaweh by Hagar on her darkest day. The God who watches over me or the God who sees me. Hagar (meaning stranger), was an Eyptian slave girl, owned by Sarai, wife of Abram. It is thought that Sarai may have come to posses Hagar as a means of dowry from Pharaoh. God had promised children to Abram and Sarai, and after some time, when the promise did not seem to be coming to pass, Sarai offered Hagar to Abram in hopes to surrogate a family through her womb. After, Sarai and Abram's disobedience, chaos sets in as is often the case when we get before the Lord in His plans. Hagar, after an altercation with Sarai, flees to the desert and at her lowest point the angel of the Lord comes to her. He calls her by name. "Hagar, Sarai's maid. Where have you come from and where are you going?" He called her by name.
Isaiah 40:26
Lift up your eyes on high, and see who has created these, who brings out their army by number. He calls them all by name. By the greatness of his might, and because he is strong in power, not one is lacking.
Each of my children were called by another name most of the duration of my pregnancies. John Paul was David Thomas until a couple of days before he was born. Chris Anne was at first called Mary Will, then Annie Elizabeth, until a few months before she came into this world. My late little surprise was James Eli until three or four days after his birth. His father had always wanted a little boy named after him, so when he came into this world so sickly, so helpless, I surprised his father with this gift to the man who for so long had been my rock and this nameless little fellow became Stanley Chris Sheppard II.
So it is with me, there are many names the enemy has called me over the years. Worthless, Cursed, Adulterer, Addicted, Promiscuous, Idolater, Liar, Thief, Unhealthy, Unstable, Murderer, Rejected, Abandoned, Unwanted, Unloved, Suicidal..Sinner. Just a few of the names Satan has used against me at some point and time in my life. Harsh realities of the characteristics of the sins of my past and the enemy of our souls calls us by the name of these sins. He uses people and situations to remind us of these names he, others and sometimes we label ourselves.
For so long, I allowed the accuser to call me by my sin. Until the day, that my father called me by the name He has given me...daughter.
In the Old Testament, when God or His angels called a person by name, it was before a promise was given. After the angel of the Lord called Haggar by name, he gave her the promise that her son would too have a powerful inheritance. That the name of Ishmael would live on and go after him for generations.
After changing Abram and Sarai's name, Jehovah gave them desires of their hearts and the promise made to them in years past. Jacob's name was changed after wrestling through the night with an angel of the Lord and the promises made to him came to fruition. Joseph's name was changed and the years of despair and sorrow were restored to him in unimaginable bounty. Haddasah's name was changed and the entire Jewish race was saved through Esther's obedience to the Lord.
In the New Testament we find that the calling of a name does not coincide with a promise to come, but with the immediate changing of hearts and lives. Just as we no longer need a high priest to come before the throne of God for us, we no longer need a promise of salvation. We have the Holy Spirit who dwells within in us and Jesus our intercessor who not only pleads our case before the Father, but changes us and the promise of salvation is done and assured once we encounter Him.
When Jesus began his earthly ministry, he recruited twelve common men. Men of no circumstance to the world, men who worked predominately among the lowliest professions, who were known only within the gates of their own cities. Yet each one He called by name and many, like Simon He changed their names.
The authors of the New Testament did not hold as much stock in women obviously as much as did the writers of the Old Testament. There are many women that Jesus spoke directly to, yet their names are never mentioned though their stories are so significant. Millions of sermons have been preached the world over about the Samaritan woman at the well. Though we are never told her name, Jesus knew it all along, for he knew everything about her. He even knew the name of her sin, for it was how she was identified among her people. But when she left that well, her "name" would forever be changed among her people because not only was she different, but she brought them back to the one who touched and changed each of their lives as well. Can you just imagine the stories told of her within the city gates after that day? I can see the people gathered around their fires at night, recounting time an again to their children of the once sinful woman who brought them to the man who gave them living water. I can just imagine that with so many husbands and lovers, she had to have had children of her own and those children had to have felt the shame of her sin as well. Can you envision the healing in their hearts as their mother was no longer the same, instead of feeling shame at her name, they would now feel a sense of pride.
Jairus's daughter is never called by name in the story. Though we never know her as anything but this man's daughter, Jesus knew her by name and when he called her from her death slumber, he would have used her name, just as he did with Lazarus. Had he only spoken the words that day and at the tomb, "Talitha Cum" or "come forth", the power in His voice would have brought forth all the dead from their slumber and tombs. Yet he chose to call each by their names, so that only those whom He called would be awakened from the sleep of death. The ultimate change from death to life.
Mary Magdalene, knew the value of a name. As she stood outside the tomb, searching in vain for the body of the one she loved so, I can only imagine that memories flood her mind as the tears flowed freely down her face. She who had once been overwhelmed by demons, whose name once evoked feelings of repulsion from her neighbors, perhaps even her family members, knew the voice of the one who had called her by name. She loved him so, she longed to show him this one last act of her devotion. In the open door of the tomb she stood weeping, when once again she heard her name. “Mary”. Oh the joy she must have felt, for she knew this voice as the one who changed her name from cursed to beloved. Upon hearing his voice one more time she, overjoyed ran to tell of the Savior who once again had called her name.
Oh, how I wish I could convey to you what He did for me when He called my name. He did this just for me. He brought me out of my slumber, out of my complacency, out of death and into life. He change my name, and though my enemies would still try to call me by my old name, though Satan would call me by my sin, my Father has changed my name. He calls me daughter.
There was a point and time over the last three years that I resented the very thought that God had seen everything that was going on in my life, yet chose not to intervene. Many said to me that God had seen this coming and He had allowed it to happen. I choose not to believe this. I choose to see my Father weeping with me over the disobedience of one He has called by name time and time again and wants so desperately to change his name to "son".
You whom I have taken from the ends of the earth, And called from its remotest parts And said to you, 'You are My servant, I have chosen you and not rejected you. 10'Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.' Isaiah 41:9-10
Tonight the Holy Spirit finally allowed me to work on this piece. I began this writing in November and so much wanted to work on this yet something always threw up a roadblock every time I sat down. Since Thanksgiving there has been only one paragraph. I sat down tonight, after the kids were asleep, with my cup of coffee in hand, a fire burning warmly and brightly in the hearth spilling the only light into the room with the exception of this computer screen, praise music washing over me from the ear buds drowning out all other sounds in the darkness and solitude of the night. Time after time this is my routine as I write. I begin with the prayer, "Holy Spirit, speak through me," and enter into a time of worship.
On this night, just before sitting down to settle in, I read a friend's post. She asked for encouragement and with the words that the Holy Spirit gave me to give to her, the flood gates once again opened on this piece. Isaiah 41:9-10 were the scriptures He gave me for her along with these words. "He knows your name and not only does he hold you in his hand but your name is engraved in His palm. Rest in this assurance, Nothing comes to you that does not sift through the fingers of the hand bearing your name." The very words He gave me for some one else, ministered to me as well.
Not only does He know my name but He has engraved my name on His palm. To engrave is to carve out, to leave an indention. Engraving is a deliberate act, one requiring precision and forethought. Engraving at one point and time, in the not so distant past, was an art performed by master craftsmen, highly valued and costly, affordable to only a select and chosen few. The initial imagine brought to mind when hearing this scripture would be to see your name on a fleshly, disembodied hand in neat and orderly Old English script.
This image is one that would make the hardest of hearts all warm and fuzzy. However, I submit to you that is image is completely false. For you see, within the palm of His hand is not a neat and tidy script with my name in perfect letters for me to see. In that Hand there is but one scar. A scar that represent not just my name, but the names of all humanity, a scar of incredible cost, for which He paid the ultimate price. For the God who sees me will one day call my name for the last time, and on that day I will place my hand in the palm of the hand that holds the scar in the shape of a nail which held Him on a cross, where He bled and died to change my name from sinner to daughter.
Today's video is from my friend Nate Fortner. Nate is an incredible song writer, singer, preacher and is an editor and author. He was nominated as 2014 Male Artist of the Year for Artists Music Guild. This young man has an incredible heart for the Lord and seeing the lost come to Jesus. Be sure to visit his website www.natefortner.com
It has been a few weeks since my last blog. The Lord has had me studying more lately, and writing less. I miss the words flowing freely, but I will be obedient. I have started two new blogs, and only gotten a few paragraphs into each. Each are incredible topics, but it is as if the Holy Spirit says not yet. So....
You, dear reader, get an excellent treat. I told you in December that I would be featuring other bloggers from time to time and sharing some of your stories as well. This week I introduce to a gentleman with an awesome gift for words. Not only are his blogs a tremendous testimony to his life and restoration through Christ, but he is an incredibly gifted speaker,singer, instrumentalist and song writer.
I introduce to you Lee Lumley. Be sure to follow him at http://leelumley.blogspot.com and for his music you can find him at http://www.reverbnation.com/leelumley. Once you start reading you won't want to stop. Meanwhile....I'm back to my writing and reading.
So when Jesus came He found that [Lazarus] had already been in the tomb four days.
They had sent for Jesus asking Him to come heal their brother. They believed that He was the Son of God and able to heal him. With expectation they waited patiently to see Him coming over the horizon. All the right things had been performed but still they watched their brother Lazarus take his last breath. In spite of their prayers, in spite of their faith, in spite of the fact that Jesus was able to heal him, Lazarus died.
It's one thing to experience the death of someone you love but it's an entirely different thing to experience that loss when you have a personal relationship with the one who holds the power to heal them. Mary, Martha and Lazarus were close friends of Jesus. They knew Him intimately and knew that He was the Son of God and was able to heal. That is why they sent for Him to come. The message they sent was simply, "Lord, behold, he whom You love is sick". They didn't even ask for healing because they knew if Jesus showed up the healing would come. They trusted His heart and knew His love for Lazarus. That's why they must have very confused and heartbroken when Jesus didn't show up.
The next four days had to have been torture for them. Not only did Jesus not heal Lazarus but He also wasn't there to comfort them in their time of grief. Thoughts of despair must have set in. They were surrounded by people who were trying to comfort them but the one person they wanted to see wasn't there. I'm sure Satan was throwing all kinds of fiery darts their way. "Jesus isn't really the Son of God" - "If He really loved you He would have healed Lazarus" - "God failed!" We read in John 11:6 that when Jesus heard Lazarus was sick he stayed where he was for two more days. The one who loved them seemed to be in no hurry to get to them. It's enough to make even the most faithful believer doubt God's love.
Sometimes God's miracles require us to be in that place of despair before they occur. We have to get to a point of complete loss before we can know the fullness of His provision. You see Jesus didn't delay because He didn't love them. He delayed because He wanted them to experience the the joy of seeing resurrection power but in order to do so they had to experience the pain of losing a loved one to death.
When Jesus finally came strolling down the lane to Bethany Mary said to Him, "Lord if you had been here he would not have died" (John 11:21) and the crowd said, "Could not this Man, who opened the eyes of the blind also have kept [Lazarus] from dying?" The anger, frustration and doubt that had built up over the past four days was now coming to light. Their loss was causing them to feel hopeless and they were focused on what Jesus didn't do and lost sight of what He was going to do.
Notice that I didn't include Martha in that paragraph. We see in verse 21 that Martha, like Mary also said, "Lord, if you had been here he would not have died" but she doesn't stop there. In verse 22 she continues on to say, "But even now I know that whatever You ask of God, God will give You". Can I let you in on a secret? God isn't afraid of our anger. He's big enough that He can handle it. When we get angry with Him and tell him how we feel He doesn't give up on us and walk away. Look at Jesus on the cross. In His moment of despair he cried out, "My God, My God why have you forsaken me!". What God wants to see is if after our "Four Day Experience" of His apparent abandonment we will still have faith that He is who He says He is.
There is a hidden truth in this story that's easily overlooked. We are told that when Martha heard that Jesus was coming she ran to meet Him. Then it says "but Mary was sitting in the house" (verse 20) I believe what this is saying is that Martha was up and moving around trying to get on with her life because she believed that Jesus was able to anything, even after death. It doesn't mean she wasn't heartbroken but that she trusted God's will. Mary on the other hand was sitting still, stuck in the moment. She was so focused on what Jesus didn't do that she didn't realize He was there in her presence. We can't let our disappointment in what God didn't do keep us from looking forward to what God is going to do.
Jesus walked up to the grave and told them to roll the stone away. Now is where the rubber meets the road. Martha who just moments ago was saying "even now I know whatever you ask of God, God will give you", was faced with putting that faith into action. It's no longer allowed to simply be a thought in her mind but God is requiring her to do something, something that in the worlds eyes makes no sense. Martha replies, "Lord by this time there is a stinch, for he has been in there for four days". You see Martha had faith that Jesus was able to raise Lazarus but she wanted it done her way. She wanted him to magically appear in front of them. Opening the tomb meant that she had to be reminded of the death. By witnessing the resurrection in this way the tomb would forever be part of the memory of Lazarus' resurrection. She wanted Jesus to erase the ugliness of the tomb from her mind but Jesus wanted to make the tomb part of the beauty of God's grace.
I don't know what loss you are dealing with today. Maybe it's the loss of a loved one, the loss of a marriage, the loss of a job. Maybe you've prayed until you're blue in the face and you trusted God to deliver you but He didn't. You may be frustrated and confused, even angry at God. I'm not going to tell you that God will raise your situation from the dead like He did Lazarus but He will put resurrection power in your life! The story of Lazarus isn't really about Lazarus' resurrection so much as about our experience when deliverance is delayed. In order for God to have complete Lordship over our life He has to be God in our "Four Day Experience" eventhough we think He has abandoned us. If He isn't Lord over those four days then He's not Lord at all.
A slave no more, except to Him who saved me!
Lee Lumley
Romans 6:6
"Knowing this, that our old man was crucified with Him, that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves of sin. FOR HE WHO HAS DIED HAS BEEN FREED FROM SIN"
According to Webster’s Dictionary the wordRepentmeansto
turn from sin and dedicate oneself to the amendment of one's life.There
is an incredibly alarming trend in the modern church. Honestly, it terrifies
me. As someone who has had a lot to repent from in my lifetime, it bothers me
tremendously, the trend to preach grace without repentance.
Please understand, that I understand how harsh this will sound. I am afraid so many will misconstrue the message here. I am a huge proponent for reaching the lost. I was once one of them. I am a proponent of loving the sinner, some may not think so if you do not read this in its entirety. I am a proponent of getting the message of salvation to the lost. But as leaders we must make certain not to leave people suckling on the milk while what they need is meat. Should we only give them the "milk" of the gospel, then we have done them an injustice. For even the enemy and his demons, believe in Jesus and his power, but they have no redemption. Love them in, but don't just tickle their ears.
My
heart aches tonight. I’m a social media junkie. If you know me, you know that.
But this week it has been a method of real discouragement. I have read so many
posts this week from friends, family members and some, even those entrusted by
the Almighty lead His people. I’ve watched virtual fist fights this week and
people claiming to be Christians, atheists, agnostics, heterosexuals, bisexuals
and homosexuals rip each other apart. I’ve seen pastors all but condemn the
teaching of the law. I’ve seen men of God condemn other men of God for teaching
repentance and for teaching that there is a standard of holiness to live up to.
One of my children was privy to a conversation where a person known to be
living in an adulterous lifestyle condemned someone living in a homosexual
lifestyle.
In
every circumstance where Jesus exemplified grace, there was turning…a change.
When
He healed, grace was extended and sins were forgiven but lives were changed,
the people left differently than they came in. This should be what we see today
in our churches. Modern theology says come dirty and Jesus will clean you, and
while this is true, you don’t return like swine to the muck and mire.
When
Jesus extended grace to the woman caught in adultery, He did not say to her “go
on back to what you were doing”. On the contrary, He said, “Go and sin no
more”, meaning that she was to cease what she had been doing. To stop, to turn,
to repent.
He
did not leave the demon filled, full of demons; he removed the demons, changing
the people so dramatically that they were no longer recognizable. On the road
to Damascus,
though Paul had not previously been afflicted, affliction was brought upon him,
but afterward he was never the same, as a matter of fact the persecutor became
the persecuted for the sake of Christ. David learned a harsh and valuable
lesson after the birth and death of his first son with Bathsheba, I attest she did as
well as you never heard of them having more affairs did you? While he was never
perfect, David never repeated the same sin twice. And if he did sin, he grieved
over his sin, he lamented and repented with everything within him. He was a man
that knew how to learn a lesson. It is for this reason that he was called “a
man after God’s own heart”. Not that he did not sin, but that it was his desire
not to and when he did, he did not blame someone else, he did not excuse it.
David was not afraid to own it and turn from it. It was in the turning he
gained the attention of God.
We
have a responsibility after grace saves us to turn from that lifestyle of sin;
otherwise we invalidate the blood of Jesus. We make a mockery of grace.
We
cannot look to men as an example of Holiness, only to Jesus. The disciples
themselves were idiots, just like us. Plain and simple. They walked with the
Savior, lived with Him, ate with Him, followed and observed every move He made
and yet they still did not get it. On the night of his arrest, before going into
the garden to pray, these selfish and arrogant men argued over who was his
favorite and who would sit bedside Him in Heaven. It was only after the
indwelling of the Holy Spirit at Pentecost that it finally sank into their thick
skulls. Even after seeing Him resurrected, they still were not fully convinced of
all they had seen with their own eyes. Sounds a lot like us, huh?
The
current trend in preaching only teaches grace. There is little talk of turning.
Popular phrases “the finished work is done” or “when Jesus died on the cross it
was finished, all your sins past, present and future were forgiven”. While
these are true statements, to simply end there is dangerous. It is the repented
sin that is covered in the past, it is the unintentional sin that is repented
in the present that is covered and it is the unintentional repented sin that is
covered in days to come.
I’m
touching on dangerous ground here and will probably catch some flack for this.
There are lifestyles (many) that are Biblically considered abominations. Old
Testament and New Testament alike reveal and concur on each of these. The
current trend is to say that Jesus came to free us from the law. While there is
a smidgen of true to this, it is dangerous to conclude that we do not need the
law. Every thing on Earth is governed by laws. Gravity, nature… we need law,
law serves to create and maintain order. Again, the law was given to Moses by
God. We believe in a Trinity, Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Jesus said himself,
“The Father and I are one” and “when you see me, you have seen the Father”.
John 1:1 says in the beginning was the Word. He was not mad at the Pharisees
for their laws; he was frustrated because they had knowledge without
understanding. It was not their laws, it was Gods law. He and father are one,
which means that he too created the law and therefore would be contradicting
himself. God cannot lie, so he cannot contradict
To
preach grace without repentance is to pull out scriptures to justify what we
want to hear. In Matthew 5:17
Jesus said “Do not think that I have come to abolish the law or the prophets; I
have come not to abolish them but to fulfill them.” In another version it reads. “I come to
accomplish its purpose”
I
enjoy a variety of preaching styles and most often if you are in my home, you
will hear preaching on one of my TVs. At my desk, when working on paperwork, I
will often have sermons going in the background while working on my reports and
paperwork. A couple of years ago a popular preacher was one that I rarely
missed. His teaching has changed though and in my thoughts, borders on heresy
now. He preaches right up to God’s love, the sacrifice and what was done
through grace, but there is NEVER any mention of the change that must come.
Never any mention that we are called to Holiness just as Christ, the sacrifice, is Holy.
I
have often said, and still contend, that an apology without repentance is
useless, it is just lip service. A couple of scenarios: you own a business and
one of your employees is stealing from you, she is caught, she apologizes and
you give her another chance. (This is what grace does) The next week it all
happens again. Then the next and the next. You begin to think what? “She really
isn’t sorry”, right?
Or
how about a child molester. He abuses the child, he apologizes, but then he
does it again and apologizes again. Over and over the cycle is repeated. Is he
truly sorry?
Common
sense says in both cases, there is no true sorrow here. There is no sorrow for
what they have done, only that they got caught.
So
it goes with sin. If we have claimed to be saved by grace, yet we continue
sinning, we have wasted grace. Hebrews 10:26 says “if we deliberately keep on
sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for
sins is left, but only a fearful expectation of judgment and of raging fire
that will consume the enemies of God. Romans 6:1-2 asks the important question
“What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? By
no means! We are those who have died to sin: how can we live in it any longer?
2 Corinthians 5:17
states “Therefore if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old
has gone, the new is here!” Friends, if you are spiritual leaders, you must
teach grace and repentance hand in hand, how else are they to be “new
creations” without rebirth or change.
Some
things bother me today and I know they must grieve the Lord as well. People who
try to rationalize sin by saying “no sin is worse than another’ or “don’t judge
lest you be judged”. No, one sin is not weighed greater than another and yes we all sin and fall short of the grace of God, but there
are 7 that God hates and from these all others flow. “Don’t judge” has become
so twisted. No, we are not to judge the person, but we are to judge their
fruits. The only example of Holy living is Christ. Years ago, WWJD bracelets
were all the rage, books and t-shirts were every where, but the question that
should have been asked was WWJND, What would Jesus Not Do? If He would not do
it, we don’t do it. Period! If the Word, the author and finisher of our faith
did not live in sin then neither should we.
The
murderer who continues to kill after claiming grace, the one who practices
witchcraft after enlightenment, the one who still worships idols after claiming
grace, the liar who continues to lie, the adulterer who continues to perpetrate
the adulterous act, the homosexual who does not convert, the harlot and the
whoremonger who continues the practice have wasted the blood of Jesus. Yes! I
said it. And yes, I believe it. If I say I believe that the Bible is the Word
of God then I must believe that EVERY word of it is TRUE. If not, then I am no
better than a Pharisee, and I have been one, I was very good at it. But I
cannot change His word. My job is to hate the sin and love the sinner.
But
in the midst of all this I must judge the fruits of those claiming to be in
Christ lest I be led astray or false teachers lead others astray.
Now
before you crucify me, let me tell you this. I have family members that
practice homosexuality. I love them with all my heart and I will fight you to
the death over them, I will cut you over them. But I will not defend the lifestyle, just as I will not
defend the lifestyle of anything or anyone else that the word of God says is
detestable. We have openly discussed this. They know I love them, they know
that their lifestyle is their choice. They know that I believe in the literal
word of God and just as I respect their right to believe what they want, they
respect my right to believe what I choose.
I
loved my husband; I would have stayed with him. He chose to walk away and
continue in a lifestyle that God says is detestable, I chose to repent and
turn. Does that make me better? I don’t know. It makes me obedient to the word
of God as it is written in the book that those claiming to be Christians
believe.
One
of the major arguments of those wanting to rationalize sin is “a loving God
would not condemn a person to hell” And they are right. It is not God that
condemns the sinner to hell, that’s the sinner’s choice. It took me a very long
time to understand free will. In the past, the free will of others frustrated me to the point of
anger with God. The very gift of free will becomes the curse we impose upon
ourselves when we make the choice not to repent.
John 3:17 For God did not send His Son to into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through him might be saved.
Now
that I have either thoroughly ticked everyone off or got you running aisles shouting
“amen”, I will answer the question that has to be on your mind if you are still
reading this. “What makes me the authority? “What gives me the right?” Well,
how about the fact that this former Pharisee, former hypocrite, in 46 years of
my life, has at some point had to repent… a lot! DO NOT misunderstand me, I am not bragging or
boasting. I say what I am about to say out of a heart that is completely
repentant, restored and humbled at the grace and mercy extended to me. Ok…with
that said, at some point and time in my life, I have broken the heart of the
father by breaking everyone of the twelve commandments (yes, there are twelve,
Jesus added two more) and at some time I have committed all but one of those
called abominations.
But
I chose not to stay there. I chose to change, to repent. I chose to heed the
voice of the Holy Spirit. We are each to bear our own cross. For me, when I
would finally surrender my heart to the Father, the Holy Spirit would place a
mirror in my face to show me how my sin broke the heart of the Father and hurt
so many others. In exposing my sin to me in such a way, I came completely
broken, sin in hand, gave it to Jesus who then covered it in His blood and now
my father mercifully lets me remember to keep me from returning to that wrong
lifestyle, yet He himself has cast if from his own memory.
Judge
me by my fruits. If you knew me then and know me now, you can. My children will
tell you, mama is not the same.
My
heart aches for humanity because in all the rationalization, justification and
accusation, I fear that most have missed the message of Christ all over again.
With
all of this said, the Holy Spirit spoke to me a couple of years ago while I was
grieving myself to death over another’s free will decision. It was then that the
spirit revealed to me that on the Day of Judgment, I will not be asked what
anyone else did. I will only be asked what I did or did not do. I will only be accountable for what I have done. I choose to exercise my free will by
repenting and turning as the Holy Spirit reveals and guides. I choose to do my
best in the strength of Christ to not only WWJD but also not do the things that
He would not do and in doings so have the assurance that my sins, having turned
from them, are covered under the blood of Christ never to be held against me
again.
Each
of us is gifted in a different area, some prophesy, some teach, some have more
than one. One of my responsibilities is to be watchmen on a wall. Watchmen
warn. It’s not a fun job, it does not make you popular, but it is necessary. A
city in a fortress with no watchman is a city waiting to be destroyed within
its own walls.
In
Revelation the spirit warns the churches that He would rather the church be hot
or cold, that he will spit the lukewarm out of his mouth, meaning it makes Him
sick. Preaching grace without turning is telling a half truth. Half truth is a
whole lie, it is misleading and allows the spirit of luke-warmness in.
Lukewarm is comfortable now but it grieves the heart of God. It also opens doors
to the spirit of discord, which has been very apparent to me this week among those
claiming to be speaking the truth.
Truth
is not relative, despite what modern society says. Truth created the Earth,
made us in His image, gave us laws to live Holy, came to Earth to dwell among us,
died on a cross to give us redemption for our sins, rose from the grave to
prepare a place for those who would repent and live Holy lives, Truth searches for us
even now to return to the fold. Truth will one day return to judge the living
and the dead.
Christians, do not compromise the gospel; do not tell only a portion. Tell them God loves
them, tell them He longs to bring them home, but show them a walk blameless and
Holy.
Sinner, there is NOTHING that you have done
that you cannot be redeemed from. Trust me, I know. You don’t have to get your
act clean to come to Him. Come as you are, learn His voice, and let Him clean
you up. Come with a repentant heart; surrender that thing you want to
rationalize, in His strength, turn from that sin that has so long had you bound
and never pick it up again. Let the Holy
Spirit be your guide. Yes, He does love you just as you are, but He loves you enough not to want to leave you where you are. It’s not easy…but oh it’s worth it.
Paul writes to the Philippians after instructing them in the truth, "There fore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed, not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence, continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling.
Psalm 51:10 Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
Maybe
I’m wrong, but I would rather err on the side of His word in hopes of hearing
“well done, thy good and faithful servant.... enter in”
This week's song: Come to the Well- Casting Crowns
Admit it, you heard Burl Ives (or Gene Wilder, depending on your generation) sing that in your head when you read that title didn't you? Yes, I did too when the title came to mind.
Well....all I can say is it has been a rather strange
couple of weeks. After writing my New Year’s entry, I was feeling very hopeful
and inspired and on the right course and basically on top of the world. Then…
New Year’s Day an illness
struck me out of the blue and knocked me for a loop. For two days my body ached
with fever, not flu like, just tender as if someone is touching a bruised area.
My throat and nasal passage were on fire, feeling like they had been scorched
raw. I could imagine them, red and raw and irritated much like the burn from a
chemical wound. My head began to stop up from the all too familiar pressure of
a cold and I retreated to bed that Thursday night to cold medications and a
warm blanket.
For four days I lay in bed
only getting up to feed the kids and go to the bathroom. Thankfully, my
daughter, stepped up to the plate and took care of her little brother. On the
fourth day, I arose, took a bath and drug myself to the doctor. Not the flu,
but a respiratory infection and a collapsed Eustachian tube.
The next day the children
and I returned to our normal routine of school, though still feeling slightly
better than death warmed over, I made a valiant effort to fulfill my duties.
During this time, is when
the enemy began his attack again.
Paul writes in Romans
7:15“For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want,
but I do the very thing I hate” Now, I have my own
theories about what Paul is talking about, and I will not touch on those in this
writing, but I understand this statement well.
Just days before, after having such divine revelation, I am right back
to the place that I know, for me, is my biggest sin…fear. You may ask, how is fear sin? Fear for me
stops me in my tracks; it paralyzes me quicker than anything. It can turn a
seemingly calm, cool and collected shell of a person into a raving lunatic on
the inside. Hand up! Yep, that’s me.
My mind begins to reel with thoughts that come from all sides. A
friend emails me and says “is anything going on? I have seen you in a ring of
fire, how can I pray for you?” That’s what it feels like on days when the fear
takes hold. Like standing in a ring of fire or being surrounded by a pack of
ravenous wolves. There’s an open space between me and my pursuer, yet I
constantly have to turn in circles to protect my back and front.
Money troubles, court dates, attacks of witchcraft (oh yeah, you had
better believe it exists, and in the church too), trying to stay one step ahead
of people who twist everything you say and do to intimidate you, fear of the
future, loneliness, loss; everyone of these is a snarling, angry entity,
snapping and lunging at me, waiting for the moment to attack and all I can do
is continuously turn in circles in the same spot.
I told you in the beginning of my writing that there would be days
when this was pretty real, well today is one of those. So what does all of this
have to do with sin? For me, fear is that thing that brings about disobedience.
For over a year I get scriptures about being strong and courageous
every day. For months it has been “put on the full armor of God” and recently
revelation that I am to partake as a warrior for the kingdom. I know, I know
you still don’t get it.
Finally,
be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might.11Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm
against the schemes of the devil.12For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against
the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness,
against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.
Ephesians 6:10-11
Stand
firm therefore, HAVING GIRDED YOUR LOINS WITH TRUTH, and HAVING PUT ON THE
BREASTPLATE OF RIGHTEOUSNESS,15and having shod YOUR FEET WITH THE PREPARATION OF THE GOSPEL OF PEACE;16in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which
you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.… And
take THE HELMET OF SALVATION, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of
God. Ephesians 6:14-17
IN ancient battles, the warrior would place on his front side, metal
plated armor. The helmet protected all but the eyes so he could see where he
was going, but often would block his peripheral vision, so he only saw straight
ahead.
The breastplate covers only
that, the breast, where the heart and vital organs lay, the soul of a man if
you will. There was no covering for the back; the warrior was to go forward,
never looking back. Charging at the enemy, defeating the enemy in front of him
with no worry of anything behind because it was already defeated in front of
him. Yielding his sword and striking mightily and hard and swiftly to quickly
may waste of the enemy before him in one feld swoop.
The shield to protect him from
the blows of the enemy’s sword and to buffet the strikes before they could even
reach the warriors body, It was customary for warriors to place oil soaked rags
on the tips of the arrows they would shoot at their enemy. Fiery darts, the
fire for really no other purpose than to be more intimidating. The shield is to
be taken up to block the onslaught of fiery darts.
Therefore
put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be
able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.
Ephesians 6:13
You see there is no armor to cover us when we retreat and fear will
make us misunderstand our commands. I believed that “to stand” meant just to be
still. But stand here is to remain grounded in what we know. Not to let
disbelief creep into the camp, but to remember the promises of God and the truth
that He has placed within my spirit. .
I sit here pouring out my secrets, if it be, though really there are
not many secrets anymore. Victoria may have them, but Shannon does not. For the
Lord has commanded me to be transparent; telling me that my fears and
insecurities are what someone else needs to hear to know that they do not walk
alone in their journey. That people are tired of seeing someone larger than
life speaking to them from exalted pulpits on topics that never touch the heart
break and pain that they desperately want answers to. The hurting want to hear
that someone understands, they want to hear that someone else has been there
and they want to know that there is hope. They want someone to be real. Not to
stand in the role of teacher and lecturer (I'm telling you about this but I’ve
not been there myself). The hurting want to know that you know the pain of the
burn of the refiner’s fire, that you understand the clamor of the confusion of
the voices calling them to stay in their disbelief. Desperate people want to
know someone else has survived and how it was done.
This journey has given me more awareness and insight into the pain of
others, as well as my own. Lesson gleaned along the way, offered from a heart
that is not ashamed of what I have been through, but has learned so much from
the wilderness of my desert and valley.
I’m listening to my radio as I
type this to you. The Jeff Berry Band’s Prayer is piping through the ear buds and drowns out all other sounds in this early morning quietness. “I believe,
yes, I believe, Lord help me unbelief”. It has become one of my favorite songs
of all times.
You see, the human in me has my GPS set. When you give a GPS a route,
you have a beginning point and an ending point and your job is complete with
the words from the disembodied voice, “you have reached your destination”. My
spirit longs for the day that I reach that destination. I have been shown the
mountain top that is my destination, I can see it in the distance, it appears
to be getting with in reach, but just when I think I will finally reach its
peak, there is yet another valley to cross and while the mountain top
destination is closer, my eyes have deceived me in the depth perception,
because my feet step into the soil of the next valley to cross to before
reaching my ending point.
I will say that it is true that valleys are locations of fertile soil.
It is in these valleys that the lessons are learned and the battles are fought.
It is in the valley where there is much rain, filling springs and rivers and
making everything green. It is also in the valley where the animals graze, and
you know what comes with grazing animals. Let’s just say, we country girls know
that it takes more than water to make the grass that green.
But it was these qualities of valleys that would draw the enemy here
to encamp around the spoils of the land, cutting off the natural supply of the
land of those they wished to conquer. In days of old, those who controlled water
controlled the world.
It was in the valley that
Gideon with only 300 defeated the Midianites and the Amalekites, with only the
promise that his enemies would be handed over to him by God. It was in the valley that
Elisha prayed for his servant’s eyes to be opened at the enemy’s camp and God
opened the eyes of the servant and on the sides of the mountains and hills
above were a host of heavenly beings prepared to battle in their stead. IN each
of these circumstances, the Lord turned the enemy upon itself and in seemingly impossible
circumstances, where nothing about the battle plan made any sense in the
warrior’s mind, victory was brought at the Hand of the Almighty. And…only the
Lord could gain the Glory.
You see there are a couple of other characteristics of valleys: they
are basins or natural armistices and they have great acoustics.
Gideon and Elisha did not stand still in place; they stood on the
promise of the God they trusted. They did the only two things they were
commanded to do. Go forth and praise. You see, God had each small army stand in
the foothills around the amassing enemy and each army sang, yelled, blew the
trumpets, clanged the symbols, and crashed the pots all in praise to the Lord
of Lords. In doing so the enemy became confused and in each circumstance ran in
various directions, turning on themselves and running directly into the path of
the warriors that never should have been able to defeat them. Our praise at the
most daunting times confuses the enemy.
One phrase stood out to me while reading the scriptures. In Judges 7:10 God tells Gideon, “But if you are afraid to go down, go
with Purah your servant down to the camp.” Gideon did take Purah with him. That tells me
that Gideon was afraid…but he went forward anyway. Want to know something cool?
Purah means “armor bearer” It’s as if God is saying to Gideon, “I know your
afraid, but take your armor and just step out and trust me”
This morning those are His words to me. “My daughter I know you are
afraid, I know there are bills to be paid with no money to do it. I know there
is a court date looming with a crafty enemy. I know you can’t see the next step
in front of you and that the control fiend in you wants to know what’s next. I know
that you are lonely and long for a help meet. I know you see no way that makes
sense. I know that I have given you a vision of a mountain top and it's taking
longer than you think it should. I know that you are weary in the battle. But
go forth with your armor bearer and I will do the rest.”
LOl, once again, I began this writing with one idea in mind. And yet
again, Holy Spirit has highjacked my process. But I needed to hear this, this
morning. And I’m just guessing someone else did too.
In my fear, do not sin. Do not fall into disobedience based on the
lies of the fiery darts of the enemy. Do not stand still paralyzed by the fear
itself. Step out of that ring of fear surrounding me and go forward, in the
Full armor of God and amidst seemingly impossible circumstances, praise Him and
be amazed at the works of the Lord.
One more secret, my flesh longs for the day that “I have arrived” to
that mountain top. Well I guess that’s not really a secret. But the scripture that
I keep getting this week is:
Philippians 3:12-14Not
that I have already obtained it or have already become perfect, but I press on
so that I may lay hold of that for which also I was laid hold of by Christ
Jesus.Brethren, I do not regard
myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies
behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the
goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.…
So
Lord if that means another valley… I step forth…standing on Your word and I’m
ready for my next lesson to draw me nearer to my prize.
Closer to
me I'm tired and I'm weak
And every breath within me is longing just to be Closer to You
So I face the road ahead
Cause I know there's no comparing To what's waiting at the end
So let the rain start falling where it will
And I will
run through this valley Just to climb to that hill
And if they ask why I'm smiling After all I've been through
It's cause I'm just a day closer to You
Mark
Schultz- Closer to You
The pathway is broken and the signs are unclear
And I don't know the reason why You brought me here
But just because You love me the way that You do
I'm gonna walk through the valley if You want me to
'Cause I'm not who I was when I took my first step
And I'm clinging to the promise You're not through with me yet
So if all of these trials bring me closer to You
Then I will go through the fire if You want me to
Ginny Owens- If You Want Me To * Two videos for you this week. If you can't get the link here, try them on YouTube. Enjoy!!!
This was both a painful song to write and a liberating, healing song to write. Let me expound…
